Staying Sane in a Blog Eat Blog World

Calling all my fellow bloggers, this one is for you… [ & if you’re not a blogger, don’t click that lil’ X just yet! Majority of the 411 in this post can also be applied to parenthood/ work life/ the world as a whole/ school/ etc. ]

I’ve been in the blogging game for a hot minute now (Fashionlush is approaching it’s 6th Bday!!!), & although I don’t claim “expert” status, there are def. a few things I’ve learned that have been crucial to keeping myself sane/together/organized.

If blogging is your hobby, more power to you. Fashionlush actually started out that way. If blogging is your business, well that’s a whole different ball game. When Fashionlush started to gain traction, I made that scary switch from blogging as a fun pastime when I didn’t have homework to blogging as my profession & life.

Yes, life. Newsflash guys, blogging is not a 9-5 job, it’s a 24/7 gig. First & foremost, before you even consider starting a blog, you need to know that.

With Fashionlush, I’ve been on one hell of a crazy & amazing journey, but it’s not all hearts & stars as many bloggers make it seem. We’re not always eating ridiculously photogenic desserts, casually buying fresh Peonies, getting our hair did, or sipping on lattes w/ a heart made out of foam.

Sure, those things are great for the Instagram feed, but what you don’t see is the BTS of blogging. Don’t get me wrong, I love every aspect of it or else I wouldn’t be doing it, but it can get down & dirty for sure.

It can also sometimes make you go kind of bat shit. I can’t even count on all twenty of my digits the times I just wanted to throw my hands in the air, trash the computer, & run away to live in a small town in Europe where technology is sparse (although that sounds like a pretty blog-worthy situation. LOL!).

It’s at those times I realize I’m losing it & have got to harness my blogging chi. There are a lot of things in this blog eat blog world that get me to that dark place, & I am pretty sure a lot of you can probs relate. So, I wanted to share some of the ways I get my marbles back when facing my top blogging frustrations head on:

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» Comparing yourself to your peers «

This ones a HUGE one… cause I can guarantee every blogger in the world (even the 6 figure ones) do this on the reg. My main tip here is to BE YOURSELF. I know this is hard, you are seeing another huge blogger growing rapidly so you want to do as they do and be as they are.

Well, that’s just not gonna fly.

The reason that one person is doing so well is most likely because they are doing there own thing and that resonates with people. If you’ve got to stop reading other blogs cause you can’t stop comparing, then STOP. Delete all those bookmarks & just do you.

“Blogs are whatever we make them. Defining ‘Blog’ is a fool’s errand.” -Michael Conniff

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» It’s just not fun anymore «

As mentioned above, Fashionlush started as a hobby. Everyday after class I really looked forward to getting creative & putting together posts to share w/ whoever was reading (back then that was 10 people a day at most- all probably family).

It’s rare that I often “dread” having to blog cause I really do love it, but every once in a while it happens. That’s when I pull the breaks, fast. I’m a firm believer in the idea that if you are doing something you love you will never work a day in your life.

When I get to the point where I am not loving it, I take a breather. Forcing yourself to write a post just because you feel obligated is a mistake. Your readers will be able to tell it’s forced, & that’s way worse than taking a day off of blogging to pull yourself together.

Write down a list of why you started blogging, what you loved most about it, & what you are currently hating about it. Review that list & create a plan of action to get you back to the place you were at when you first bought your domain.

“The bottom line is that blogging is like sex. You can’t fake it. You can’t fake passion. You can’t fake wanting to engage with the public. If you do, it will ultimately be an unsatisfying experience for both the blogger and their readers.” -Kevin Anderson

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» Your social life is a thing of the past «

Fact, juggling a social life & a full time blog is a toughy.

Chances are you don’t belong to a cult of blogging friends, so prepare yourself for this– no one around you will really “get” your world. They will tease you when you don’t touch your food until you get the perfect photo, they will get annoyed when they have to wait to eat lunch cause you need to snap a few shots of your #OOTD, & they won’t understand what you mean when you say “SORRY! Can’t make it to dinner, gotta work”.

To them, your work probably seems pretty easy. A few hours on the computer a day, some light social networking, & then you just are free to play around in your closet or whip up a casual apple pie.

Us bloggers, we know damn well that’s not the case. Blogging is a hard concept for a lot of people to grasp, but that doesn’t mean you should ditch all your friends and marry your computer.

Instead, create structure in your life. I do so with the help of to-do lists, a content calendar, & deadlines. I write down all of my planned weekly posts on my content calendar every Sunday night, I create a to-do list of what needs to be done that week, I set deadlines for when I want it all to be done by, & when it’s completed I close the computer.

If you stick to your schedule, you should be done with your work by 5pm Friday just in time for happy hour with your girlfriends.

“Only on the Internet can a person be lonely and popular at the same time.” -Allison Burnett

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» Where’s the money?! «

A lot of people out there start a blog cause they heard through the grapevine that it’s a get rich quick kind of deal. Start blogging & you will quickly see that is not the case.

If the driving force behind blogging is to make a million dollars in a year, do us all a favor & keep your day job. Sorry if that’s harsh, but it’s the truth.

To make money blogging you need to create a following & to create a following you need quality content that brings value. This type of content comes from honest to goodness passion.

Another tidbit of advice I’ve picked up while blogging is that it takes money to make money. Spending money when you aren’t making any can hurt, but you’ve got to keep your eye on the prize.

When I say spend money, let me make this very crystal effing clear, I AM ABSOLUTELY NOT SUGGESTING THAT YOU BUY LIKES/FOLLOWERS/VIEWS. Buying a fake following will never get you anywhere but in debt. Plus, it’s tacky & everyone knows.

Sorry if I sound like a total B, but cheating just isn’t cool.

Instead, spend your money wisely. Get a blog make-over, invest in an SEO specialist, get a nice camera to take better pictures, buy Photoshop, purchase AD space on sites w/ similar target markets, take a workshop… you get the drift. Save your pretty pennies & use it where it counts to help build an authentic & loyal following.

“It should feel genuinely good to earn income from your blog – you should be driven by a healthy ambition to succeed. If your blog provides genuine value, you fully deserve to earn income from it.” -Steve Pavlina

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» Doubting yourself «

It’s bound to happen, and you will feel like crap when it does.

“No one is commenting, & I even included a question at the end of my post. How embarrassing!!!”

“WTF, I lost a subscriber?! I’m going to go drown in my own tears”.

“The world is over, I have 5 less pageviews then yesterday. WHERE DID I DO WRONG!”

“IDGI, I spent 5 hours on photoshopping that quote, why didn’t get any shares on Facebook? I QUIT.”

Dear lord people, please, cut yourself some slack! The fact that you are even putting yourself out there is pretty badass in itself. Stop the blog self-hate & give yourself some much needed props. It could be MONTHS till people start commenting and sharing your posts by the masses, but it doesn’t mean they are not being read. As Dora said, “JUST KEEP SWIMMING!” & keep the conversation going. If you build it, they will come.

“Blogging is a conversation, not a code.” -Mike Butcher 

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» Creative blocks are a b*tch «

Yup, it’s true & I deal with them all the freaking time. Sure, it’s easy when you’re feeling uninspired to just search Pinterest and find something to blog about, but where is the originality in that?

By biggest tip to you with this one is to get outside your box. You have a set idea in your head of what your blog should be & what other people will respond to, these standards you’ve set for yourself are a major contributor (at least for me) to creative blocks.

You’re limiting yourself because you are worrying way too much about what other people will think is cool, rather than just doing what you think is cool. Let your blogger bun down & try something different.

Your bloggers will appreciate the change of pace & you will most likely snap out of your stagnant blogging routine.

“If you’re going to fall out of love with public approval, something interesting will happen: people will be deeply attracted to your work.” -Jeff Goins

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» Brand rejection «

Brand rejection is like asking the most popular boy in school to prom & him saying he already has a date.

It literally feels like the world just fell down on your head & there is absolutely no one else in the entire universe you would ever want to take to the dance work with.

My advice to you, & girls suffering from prom rejection (been there, done that), don’t give up & don’t take it so personally.

Be the gracious professional you are and tell them you love the brand, ask them what they are looking for in blogger collaborations, ask if there is a better time to follow up (maybe they hit their budget for the year), & thank them for their time.

Then… move on.

I am always going to tell you to aim high, but this is one field where I personally think it’s okay to seek out the underdog. Keep your feelers out for the up & comers. They may not have 1.6 million Instagram followers, but if you you like what they are doing & see potential in the product/brand, hop on that train now before they blow up.

These type of lasting & loyal partnerships are personally the ones I value most… and could very well be the ones that make the biggest difference in the end.

“If you accept all the praise, you have to accept all the critics.” -Chris Brogan

….anddddd that’s a wrap!!

What are your guys’ biggest blogging frustrations? I’d love to hear ’em & maybe even offer some advice :).

x, E

p.s. you can find more helpful blogging tips here & my blog design company here. 

p.p.s the above rad calendar can be found here– it’s a printable freebie!!